The Weather

I started writing about the weather in Memphis. All I need to say is the end of the summer it was hot. Super hot. Unbearably hot.

In my mind it is still hot, considering that it is going to make the mid 60s at the end of November. At least now I am not complaining. I am going to get out and enjoy it. Champ and I are going to go out to Shelby Farms for some exploring in the world's largest dog park.

Tuesday

Tuesday the 25th of September was the crappiest day in Memphis.
Tuesday morning Christopher had Buddy euthanized.
Tuesday afternoon I recieved a phone call that our neighbor in Cincinnati had died on Friday night.
Tuesday I called my parents and my dad was sick.

Tuesday I was one of those rare days where thought I don't like being a grown-up. It was one of those rare days when I was a grown-up.

10 Good Things About Buddy

Christopher made a very difficult decison this morning. Everytime I have a loss I think of a book that we read when I was a kid: Ten Good Things About Barney.

These are my ten for Buddy:

1. He would come when he was called.
2. He sat in open windows and when the wind blew he closed his eyes and inhaled.
3. He found great hiding places.
4. He played with socks when Christopher would match them after doing laundry.
5. He sat on your lap when you were at the computer.
6. He would tap you with his paw when he wanted to be fed or loved, mostly fed.
7. He soaked up sun puddles.
8. He let Christopher rud his belly.
9. He was always home when Christopher needed a friend.
10. We loved him, and he let us.

3 houses 1 year

Christopher and I have been involved with the sale of 3 houses in the last year. Not a damn one of them has gone smoothly.

First was Christopher's father's rental property in Cincinnati. Chris had been managing the property for his dad and took on the power of attorney when it was time to sell the property. The buyer's realtor had a heart attack and died on his way to the closing. We were delayed a few day.

Second we sold Christopher's house. It was on the market the first time for six plus months with no offer. No offer on a house in a great school district, new air conditioning and a finished basement. We took the house of the market in late October, I just did not want to have to move the weekend of our wedding. Granted we had not offers and all of our guests would have just had to carry one thing out to the truck.

At the beginning of the year Christopher's house went back on the market and in 2 weeks we had an offer. Something happened, I don't even know what but we were delayed for about 2 weeks after the originally scheduled closing.

Third, my house. It went on the market in December of last year. The house is a 2 family in a questionable neighborhood and still needs some repairs. The price was eventually dropped to $1,000 over what I paid.

Now, I did not just live in this house. I did some work. Well I should say my Dad, Chuck and Christopher did some work. I refinished the wood floors on the 1st floor. (I actually did do that myself.) New carpet upstairs, fixed some plumbing issues, New floors in both kitchens, beautiful brand new cabinets on the first floor. Interior and exterior of the house were painted. New awning on the 2nd floor porch. New light switches, shelving in the basement.

Because of the fucking market, I am getting screwed on price. No return for all that we have done in the house.

In July we got an offer on the house. I bled a little more to make the deal. We were to close on the 25 of August. I moved to Memphis on the 26th. But, the buyer's loan program dried up- no money for the buyer- more house payments for me. We then agreed to the 25th of September. Yesterday we found out the buyer has some issue and the loan again is not going to be made. Another house payment for me.

Christopher and I have been stressing and struggling with the thought of maintaining the house while it sits empty. You have to have the gas and electric on to show the house, someone has to maintain the yard, change light bulbs and make sure nothing gets vandalized.

Yes, we could rent the apartments. No, we do not want to be long distant landlords. I did not do to well as a landlord when I lived in the house, imagine being 7.5 hours away. It costs about 10% of the rent to have someone property manage a building.

We have been looking forward to not dealing with the sale and stress of selling a house. We are hoping it will end soon.

Anyone want to buy a house?

Good Friend

Jan is my very good friend. There are not many people that will go to a movie with you even when they will know it is a bad movie. Or will just go to the theater and see what movie is playing next. If it is an exceptionally bad movie "poop" gets inserted into the title. Such as "Poop Floats, Random Poop, and Poop House."

We have been known to drive around and change the names of streets to things that have a sexual connotation. My favorite has always been Ripple Wood Drive changed to Nipple Wood Drive.


So people probably would not put us in the category of great intellect - more likely the easily entertained.

Jan is my friend, and I was not able to bring her with me when I moved to Memphis.

Jan is my friend, and she calls me 3-4 times a week when she is on her way home from work. And we have our completely random conversations about the dogs, bad drives, what I am making for dinner, what book we are reading or other goofy thing that has happen during the day.

Jan is my friend, and I don't tell her how much I miss her. But, I do.

Duhhhh

On Sunday we drove to Tunica, Mississippi. My dad wanted to see the river. Most people go to Tunica to gamble at the casinos. These are amazing buildings themed and growing right out of a cotton field.

We found a park, which we all agreed was some sort of payoff by the casinos. It has a beautiful observation building, river boat dock and a museum about the river. The Mississippi River.

Christopher and I were not aware of another beautiful park, without the observation building and museum right here in Memphis. It is a mere 3.3 miles from the apartment.

I walked Champ in this much closer park. I found myself doing what I do when I walk in a city. Looking for homeless camps, squats or other evidence of people living on the street. I saw 2 tents in a wooded area. I was up on a bluff looking down. Turning around and looking up I saw multi-million dollar homes.

I wondered if they knew their neighbors.

Thinking about work

I went the other day to a day time drop in center for the homeless. It was not like Anthony House, and it was like Anthony House.

Anthony House is the last place I worked in Cincinnati. I ran the program for Lighthouse Youth Services. (LYS.org) We were a drop in center open M-W-F afternoon. We were focused on people up to the age of 26. We provided food, shower, laundry, harm reduction materials (condoms, bleach kits, etc.) Hats, gloves, scarves in the winter and basics like socks and undies year round. And an understanding dedicated wonderful smart kind funny nurse 2 days a week. We also provided case management- meaning we worked with people one on one to address their needs and get them into affordable, safe and maintainable housing.

I really loved this job. I loved the people that I was working clients and co-workers.

The place I went to visit has been open for just a few months, and it is a faith based organization. Most of the services for the homeless seem to be in Memphis.

Things good different:

• Lockers for people to keep their stuff.
• Large area for people to hang out.
• Lots of space for people to meet privately. (or so it appeared)
• 5 or so volunteers providing direct services.
• Good Lighting.
• New tables and Chairs.
• Aquarium.

Things different:

• No case management, strictly referrals.
• Faith based, with Chapel and prayer.
• No food.
• No Nurse.
• No shower.
• No socks, underwear and t-shirts.
• Very sterile and institutional.

So, it is not Anthony House. It is not what I know. That is probably good.

I came here to Memphis with the intention of doing a job that I would not bring home, that I would work a set number of hours, that would not take an emotional toll.

I have job offer from Target, to work as a cashier. Christmas is coming- the greed and debt abound.

Now I am not so sure which one-Target or working with people experiencing homelessness will take the more emotional toll.

Playing Host

Christopher and I had our first guests this weekend. My Mom and Dad came to visit. I think it was really a mission on my mom's part to check on me. I think she wanted to ensure that everything is o.k. in Memphis.

I knew of only one thing that I really wanted to share with my Mom. The Civil Rights Museum. Growing up I knew my mom's hero was Rosa Parks. The woman credited with taking a seat and refusing to stand to give a white person the seat, as was the law in Montgomery, Alabama. This act was credited with starting the Bus Boycott. This museum shows the other heroes and other struggles in the U.S. Civil Rights fight. It is not the kind of place that you feel good about being, but the kind of place where you feel moved to have been. It is a powerful place that I would like to take all of the people that come to visit us in Memphis.

On Sunday we found a park in Mississippi on the River. We saw an armadillo, who knew they would be in the Mississippi wild.

The rest of the time we did the things I always do with my family. Eat and walk the dog. It was a great visit. I don't think I would have done anything differently. The visit felt like what I can remember when my Grandparents would visit when I was a kid. Not a lot of rushing around to take in all of the sights, but just living where you are with the people you love.

The Grocery Store

In close proximity to the apartment is a Kroger, Piggly Wiggly and Schnucks. All 3 are old school "supermarkets." Each has a bakery, deli, cleaning supplies, organic section and ladies at the check out counters that are a 100 years old. Each one of the stores is a bit dingy, run down and smallish. They are not the well lit, wide aisle, hi-tech check-out of the suburbs. And I kind of like that because I am currently doing much smaller shops to accommodate the lack of storage in the apartment.



I find that I am gravitating to the Schnucks. And I am doing that because it is the worst of the 3. The thinnest aisles and people, me included, stop randomly in the middle of the aisle and make a 3 point turn because you cant make a straight U-turn. I have to wait for people to find what they are looking for on the shelves; be careful when I make a turn into an aisle and wear a jacket because it is as cold in there as the North Pole in January.



I am also going because it is the best of the 3. The parking lot security guards are the friendliest. The staff in the store is helpful. The customers are pretty varied, from the very old to the newly on there own. It feels like Keller's IGA in Cincinnati. It feels like home

Too Much Stuff

The guys came with the truck on a Monday morning. They had left Cincinnati about 11 pm the night before and were heading to Florida with some other people's stuff when they done unloading our stuff.

Jeff, the driver, informed me that we have about one third the amount of stuff of his average move. He estimated that we had about 7 to 8 thousand pounds of stuff. His typical move is 24 to 36 thousand pounds of stuff.

So we don't have a lot of stuff?

We still had too much stuff for the 2 bedroom apartment that we have rented in Midtown Memphis. We filled up the apartment. We filled up 2 storage units (0ne medium, one small.) We filled up the Tahoe with things for Goodwill.

The only things we will be bringing into this apartment are edible. And not a lot at one time. There is no where to store it.

2 weeks

No matter what in 2 weeks I am moving to Memphis. Christopher, my husband, has been in Memphis for 2.5 months without me. I have been in Cincinnati finishing up at my job, throwing out lots of worldly possessions and waiting for the house to sell.

My job is over. I picked out and trianed my replacement.
I think I have gotten down our worldly possessions enough that they will fit into a 2 bedroom apartment with 2 cats and a crazy German Shorthair Pointer.

I am still waiting on the house to sell. We have buyers, they just are kind of oblivious. To start with they are from out of state and the original company they went to for a loan does not do out of state loans. They have a new lender, but still have not had the house appraised or been in contact with their realator. Meaning, shit is going to fucked up for the closing. If we have a closing.

Because the market is what it is and the house is where it is- they are getting a deal. I am selling the house for less than I paid. I am getting no return on the 15 thousand I have put into this place with the help of my parents. Especially my dad. He has spents days in my house making imporvements while I was at work. He has answered hundreds of questions about how I fix things. My friend, Chuck, has also put in countless hours, putting in floors, designing the kitchen and following behind me finishing the small details.

All of this because I want to get to Memphis!
I want to get to Memphis.
I want to get to Memphis?

I have so much to look forward to like missing my friends, my family, my job, my house and the life I have been living. And the answer is yes, I want to be in Memphis. Christopher is in Memphis, and he has promised me I can come home to see the other people I love.